Perhaps you have heard about the Teal Pumpkin Project, an effort to make trick-or-treating safe for kids with food allergies. Lay aside whatever convictions you may have about the holiday in question for a moment and consider the theological truths behind those odd-colored pumpkins. While I might have paid little attention to this a few years ago, it serves as yet another painful reminder to me and my family that we live in a broken world. Having a son with life-threatening food allergies will change how you think about such things. In fact, it changes how you think about most everything.

If you and your family do not have to deal with food allergies, you may find it hard to relate to those among us who have to pray, “Give us this day our gluten-free bread.” But whether it is a friend or fellow church member, learning about someone else’s daily struggles is integral to loving your neighbor.

I am not an expert on this subject by any means (although my wife is quickly becoming one). I am not an activist trying to make anyone feel guilty. I’m just a dad and a disciple of Jesus, who deals with food allergies everyday. Here are a few things I have learned. I hope these brief thoughts might start some healthy conversations among Christian brothers and sisters.

Food allergies and loving your neighbor

Churches cannot be all things to all people on this issue and families should not expect them to be. There are just too many conditions out there. However, it is comforting when church leaders are at least mindful of families with food allergies; and it is hard to feel welcome when they are not.

Consider the times when someone might encounter food at your church. Do parents know what snacks their kids will be offered during Sunday school? Do dietary restrictions bar anyone from communion? Are your leaders aware of allergy families? Most of us do not expect everyone else to memorize our issues or skip out on things they can enjoy so we don’t feel left out. We just want to participate in the church potluck with minimal anxiety. Pastors, are you teaching your people how to love their neighbors who carry EpiPens?

Food allergies and trusting the Lord

Simply being aware of the challenges and offering a word of encouragement every now and then can go a long way. Did you know that there are moms shopping for “safe candy” this week? Have you considered the parents in your congregation who are already praying for their child’s protection at this week’s Halloween/Fall Festival/Reformation Day party? Life is more complex with food allergies. Every meal requires planning and wisdom. Every bite is a bit of a threat.

The parties and snacks are not the problem, of course. We shouldn’t demonize those who plan them either. Though it is a daily battle not to get overwhelmed, Christians living with food allergies must guard themselves from envying others who are free to eat what they want.

When you have to check every label, it can feel like meals are your master. Families with allergies can focus so much on the risks around them that they fail to trust the Lord. We need the rest of you to gently remind us that our final hope is not in the FDA but in the One who feeds the birds of the air (Matt. 6:26). He created food to be enjoyed with thanksgiving (1 Tim. 4:4) and he is sovereign over our every snack. Sometimes we just need to hear those truths.

Food allergies and longing for Heaven

In my best moments, I am thankful for my son’s peanut allergy. It has prompted many conversations with him that I’m not sure we would have had in other circumstances. We try to tell him often that he will not always have food allergies. His issues may last through this life, but this broken body will someday be redeemed. It will return to the dust to be raised anew.

Interestingly, the Lord chose to describe our heavenly future in the language of a feast. This can feel a bit perplexing to someone who approaches a potluck like an Olympic event; yet, the Bible is clear. The king has gone to prepare a place for us and a wedding supper will celebrate his success (Rev. 19:6-9). There will be no teal pumpkins there. We won’t have to remember the EpiPen, check the labels, or bring our own substitutes. We will feast in freedom and fear no consequences.

We who carry the burden of food allergies may have an inside track on appreciating that heavenly meal. If you live with a food allergy in your family, be encouraged. This day is coming. When you feel tempted to despair, take a moment to praise God for the reminder that we remain in a far country, being thankful for a heavenly home free from some such hassles.

If you do not have firsthand experience with such challenges, may the teal pumpkins you see this week be a reminder to pray for those who do. You need not feel guilty for enjoying your own treats (Eccl. 9:7), but perhaps you could be an encouragement to the families around you who will be glad when it is over (even as we begin preparing alternative options for the next food-centric holiday).

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Matthew D. Haste (Ph.D., SBTS) is an associate professor of ministry studies at Columbia International Seminary and School of Ministry in Columbia, SC, where he serves as Faculty Mentor for the 5-year B.A./M.Div Program. He is married to Cheyenne and they have three kids: Haddon, Anna, and Adelyn. He is co-author, along with Robert L. Plummer, of Held in Honor: Wisdom for your Marriage from Voices of the Past (Christian Focus, 2015).